I am Thankful.

Life is good. :)

and I 'm glad.

and seeing as today is Thanksgiving- this is my thankful list:

I'm Thankful...

• That I have a loving home to come back to. 
• That I have parents to set strong examples for me.
• That My Heavenly Father Loves me.
• For my comfy "home bed" 
• The Friends who make me smile.
• That the things that don't work out always make room for better things.
• For the Yellow Submarine movie.
• For an baby sister to cuddle with.
• For a best friend that can make anything fantastic. (even taxi-cabbing siblings.)
• That my cat, George, finally let me pet him.
• That my Shoobie lets me tell her stories 24/7.
• That my brother always has something to say.
• For pie.
• For grandparents slides. (even the sideways ones that give you a kink in the neck.)
• For the rotate picture button on computers.
• For Letters.
• That my cousins are the coolest on the planet.
• For Dreams
• For the Seasons
• That I can watch red-neck tv shows with my step-dad.
• That Mom still makes me email Santa.
• For an aunt that thinks of everything. (she bought Tupperware so all of the college students could take leftovers back to school. Yes!)
• for having access to a car.
• For the temporary escape holiday breaks provide.
• For Memories.
• For Laughing
• That I don't have to worry too much about being a cat lady.
• For Duct Tape.
• for the game Catch phrase
• For spontaneous decisions
• For people who change your life without even knowing it.
• For inspiration.

And pretty much a lot more stuff than I can write... :)

Herman.

The other day, I had this sudden burning desire to donate money to small businesses in Africa by throwing expensive paper airplanes.

... Or something like that.

The business department was putting on some fundraiser- and I found myself being sucked into it. yeah I admit- I didn't go because of the good feeling I would get giving money to a good cause. I mostly just wanted to throw airplanes. and see the people that would be there.

ok. mostly the second one.

And I guess I have this bad habit of dragging my friends along with me on my ventures- "It'll be great fun!" "We'll be pro!" and "I don't want to go all by my lonesome" are common phrases used. All in all, Its a good thing I have a supportive Abbie. She kindly agreed to meet me there.

I got there a little early, thinking I could stop at the marketplace to eat beforehand- but then found out there would be no effective way to do that without being seen by the "Airplaners." I felt pretty stupid- ("Oh gosh- now I just seem over excited.. Um, I really like paper? yeah, no one is going to buy that...") So I hid in the bathroom, a really logical solution.(except for not...)

Hiding in bathrooms is great. After the initial feeling of "Oh goodie, I've escaped!"- you kind of feel like a moron. Especially when you scream because your cell phone startles you.

"Hey, I'm here."

Abbie's ring tone is me singing the Harry Potter theme. I recorded it in a highschool parking lot.

"Hi. I was just in the bathroom" heh heh, cough... "Be out in a sec."

Thus the throwing adventure begins.

First off, it turns out I'm really awful at making airplanes- no thanks to Google. Abbie suggested I try making one with wings. Good plan. However, I wasn't about to spend another dollar to make a new one. "Maybe I just need practice throwing it?" (translation: Lets get out of here before that boy over there sees me. and my crappy airplane.) Cue sneaky escape towards the stairs- "Hey! Shawna!"

crap.

"Ohh, Hey."

At this point I realized two things:

1. My escape had been foiled once again.
2. Its really easy to become distracted by a man's mustache.

"You aren't leaving are you? have you thrown your plane yet?" 

"um. I was just going to practice." For any of  you who know me- "practicing" happens a lot in my life.

"Ok, you do that. Hurry back though!"

So, then I was stuck. Luckily, thanks to Abbie's paper airplane skills (aquired from a contest as a 7 year old. She's pretty much great.) a few last minute adjustments were made to my plane. I like to think this is the reason I didn't fail as much as I could have.

Meaning i still did. fail.

I threw it, It hovered for a moment, then spiraled downward, crash-landing two feet from where I had been standing.

ouch.

it doesn't help that lots of people were there to witness it. or that I have a way of awkwardly yelling "NO!" when i mess up. Or that mustache man happened to be talking into a microphone when he said "Nice try, Shawna!"...

My pride had crashed along with the airplane.

But Its all good. After trying and failing at two more airplanes, (more good for Africa, right?) Abbie and I went home and watched Charade. The combination of Audry Hepburn, Cary Grant, Popcorn, and a good friend are enough to make anything better. 

Thoughts:

1. Don't trust everything Google says.
2. You can, in fact, judge a man by his mustache
3. "Don't be piggy Herman."

I get why ostriches burry their heads in holes...

Oh, Hi. you can call me awkward. 

I've always been pretty great at talking to strangers- much to my parents dismay. I meet great ones everywhere- on the bus, when wandering around churches, in the library, while crying on park benches, when crossing the street, during dinner, in art galleries...

But Please, Tell me- Why is it so easy to talk to them, and so incredibly difficult to talk to someone you actually know??

"yeah, um... sorry, but I seem to have misplaced my verbal communication skills. let me stare awkwardly at my lap, or at the ceiling, or at your face when you talk to me..."

"You going home for thanks giving?"

"..... yeah..."

"Oh that's fun."

"...yeah.... oh, um what about you?"

"Probably to my grandparents house. but its a lot of gas to get there, and I don't know if I want to drive in this weather..."

"..... oh.... um yeah.... Bye."

*mentally hits self in forehead for being such a goob.*

sometimes I wonder how I manage to keep friends.

Yesterday, I went to stake conference with my family. My sister suddenly nudged me in the arm- " Is that Allen?" I looked around, and surprise it was! My long lost skater-artist friend was going to the row behind us.

"Say hi to him!" she whispered. I nodded, then tried to make eye contact- when I suddenly got this stupid worry that it was really his twin brother Adam. So, instead of saying hi like a normal person when he was in good view, I waited until he was walking right behind me- you know so i could get a closer look at him. The ending result was me almost head butting him in the stomach as I leaned my head back to look at his face. Our eyes met awkwardly, I whispered "Allen?" and he sat down without saying anything.

 Oh Gee.

"One of these things is not like the other."

Hot chocolate with the girls on my floor. Cool. ish.

They're nice- but I can't help but feel like something isn't quite clicking.

I  don't squeal-giggle. (laugh-giggles are different.)

I haven't made out with countless boys.

I don't care if "Sally" kissed "Jim", while she was dating "Bob". (I don't know them anyway.)

If I like a guy- It'll last for more than two weeks.

I don't giggle over how "Marge's" hair looked.

I cry during stupid parts in movies.

The last time I held someone's hand- I meant it.

I'd rather color than go man hunting.

Maybe I'm weird.

Whatever.

Not very many people.

"Not very many people's shoe laces match their scarves." he said.

I took it as a compliment. because I'm not very many people. 

Yesterday, although I woke up exhausted*, I also woke up with a newly found bout of confidence. (Finally! Where have you Beeen??) Why shouldn't I be happy with myself? I can whistle, doodle, and pull off a rainbow scarf quite nicely- As a friend of mine recently said, "If that's not enough for someone- then they're missing out!"

so there.

 

*(staying up past midnight two nights in a row is not recommended. unless it involves a very much needed Skype conversation with a best friend.)

Hi. I'm confused.

So, I'm sitting here. On my friend's grandma's couch. At two in the morning.

Why?

My life just works like that.

Not that I'm complaining or anything- I'm sure many people would love to start their first blog amidst sleeping friends, orange carpet, and the stress of trying to register for spring semester classes when the website's backed up....
The creepy grandfather clock adds a nice touch too.

Anyway. nice to meet you.